04Jun
Tyra Lane-KingslandReal Life, Spiritual Life

How To Deal With The Pain of Civil Unrest

Our nation is in crisis. From plagues and pestilence to systemic racism being played out daily as Black and Brown bodies continue to be subjugated by Whites, our world is in turmoil.

 

Chances are you are running the full gamut of emotions, from frustration and sorrow to anger or even just plain numb. As I’ve watched the events of the past few weeks, I’ve cried, I’ve stewed, I’ve measure my words as I’ve tried to explain these events to my children. And it’s not just the me who I am today feeling this. In me lies the pain of my mother’s, mother’s mother and her mother before her. My very DNA groans in agony.

 

This has been downright HARD! Can you agree?

 

So what do we do with these feelings? How do we navigate through the iceberg of emotions? Because of our personal life experiences we are going to process these events differently. Here are a few ways we can deal with the pain of civil unrest.

 

Permission To Process

Give yourself permission to process and grieve in ways that are suitable for you. You want to cry? CRY. You want to be alone? Spend some time alone. Allow yourself to sit and to feel. Acknowledge your feelings by naming them. Give voice to your feelings.

 

Groan

What happens when we lack the ability and the vocabulary to convey our feelings in coherent words? We groan. That sounds comes from deep in our bellies and out through the throat. It is an honored expression. Even The Spirit Himself utters groanings for us when we don’t know what to pray (Romans 8:26).

 

Obey What God’s Telling You

One of the greatest actions you can take at this time is to commune with God, listen to Him and DO what He tells you to do. Obedience is God’s love language (John 14:15) and if you say you love Him, simply do what He tells you to do. The greatest revolution you can wage is to walk boldly in the purpose for which God put you on this earth. God needs EACH & EVERY Believer suited in their armor, obediently walking out their calling. Whether it’s raising your children, raising your voice in protest or raising your dollar to sow it into a worthy cause, DO the thing He’s called you to do.

 

Take Action

What can you do to directly be a part of the change you seek?

  • Fast & Pray for Jehovah Sabaoth, the Lord of Hosts and His legion of Angels to come against the spirit of terrorism, division, murder and mayhem.
  • Engage in meaningful conversations with people of other races. Share your truth.
  • Support Black owned businesses
  • Engage in peaceful protest
  • Teach your children about race relations
  • Call/Write your local officials
  • Donate $ to a fund (Like Justice for Breonna, The Innocent Project, George Floyd Memorial Fund)
  • Sign a petition
  • Vote

 

Embrace The Moment

Be intentional to take breaks from the bombardment of external chatter so that you can process, think clearly and connect with God. We have to strike a balance between being informed and becoming depressed with the information we are consuming. We have to be purposeful to embrace silence and stillness in the Father’s presence. It is here that we are restored and refreshed so that we can engage when God calls us to act.

 

Friends I am praying for you. The enemy would like nothing more than for us to lose hope but remain hopeful. Our God, Adonai is Sovereign. He is Elyon our God Most High. With all power, authority and dominion in His hands, He will sustain you and I and He will see His kingdome come, His will be done.

 

As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!

01May
Tyra Lane-KingslandReal Life 1

10 Practical Ways To Manage Stress

April was National Stress Awareness Month and in May we recognize Mental Health Month. And in light of our current global crisis, it is critical that we proactively protect our minds and our emotions. Stress can certainly be a huge contributor to ebbing away at our mental health so we want to do what we can to get the help we need.

 

Let’s face it, if you are a human being, living on this planet, at some point you will come face to face with stress. We will all come to the place where life’s demands exceed our bandwidth, reaching beyond our capacity to handle. And that’s the place where we can begin to feel stress.

 

In and of itself, stress is not such a bad thing. God hardwired this response into every human. From the dawn of humanity until now, this automatic response mechanism has protected us from imminent danger. From warding off an animal attack hundreds of years ago to quickly stepping on the brakes to avoid a car crash today, stress gives way to the release of hormones enabling our bodies to jump into protective mode.

 

It becomes problematic though when our bodies are constantly operating from the protective mode. While we cannot control all the stressors that life presents but we can control our responses to them.  

 

You will manage stress, stress won’t manage you.

 

10 Practical Ways To Manage Stress

You don’t have to do all of them at once. Perhaps you can adopt one a day or practice one a week until they are ingrained and become part of your regular wellness protocol. Employing the following practices has personally helped me heal from past trauma, manage the demands of caring for a large family while serving my community, grow as a disciple of God and effectively handle the pressures of life.

 

Mindfulness 

Be transformed by renewal of the mind (Romans 12:2). Be purposeful in thinking about the things you think about. When your thoughts are pulled away by worry, fear, and anxiety, cast those down and shift your thoughts to those that are excellent and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8).

 

Meditation 

Think deeply on God’s word. Day and night meditate on His precepts. Ponder on His goodness and faithfulness. The Psalms encourage us again and again to meditate day and night.

 

Laughter

Sometimes I envy my husband. Laughter comes easily to him. I tend to be more serious and can get consumed by what needs to be done and that has a way of squeezing out laughter. A cheerful heart is good medicine (Proverbs 17:22) so take a dose of laughter so that you stay well.

 

Sun Therapy

Light therapy, also known as heliotherapy has been used for ages to heal people. From skin disorders to depression, studies have proven the sun’s ability to heal. So when possible, get outdoors and soak up the sun. It will work wonders to calm your nerves and boost your mood. Arise, shine for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you Isaiah 60:1

 

Deep Breathing

While you’re out there in the sun, breath deeply. Deep breathing calms your nervous system, releases serotonin, and increases your oxygen intake causing you to lower your heart rate, lower your blood pressure and exhale toxins. This is a powerful way to bring about relaxation and peace. 

 

Essential Oils

One of the things that you can breathe deeply is essential oils. Coupling oils with the above practices supercharges their effectiveness. Since the beginning of time, plants and herbs have been used to heal mankind. The bible tells us in Revelation 22:2, the leaves on the trees are for the healing of the nations. Essential oils like Clary Sage and Lavender promote relaxation and boost hope.

 

Sleep

Have you ever experienced the rejuvenating power of a good night’s sleep? Review your sleep hygiene practices. Are you creating an atmosphere conducive for a good night’s rest? Limiting electronics, bathing before bed, using Lavender essential oil and prayer are all practices that can aid you in having a better night’s sleep. Your brain has A LOT of work to do in cataloging all the work you’ve done for the day so you’ve got to get some good sleep. Sleep affects for daily performance and even your weight so go to bed!

 

Exercise

On the other side of sleep is movement. Exercise is an effective way to release endorphins promoting a release of stress and inviting in feel good emotions. So move that body and get your happy on. Exercise isn’t my favorite thing to do but I know it’s good for me so I make it a priority. I’m not saying you’ve got to be a super athlete but I am suggesting that you get that blood flowing, get that heart stimulated and move. 

 

Eating Right

Do you understand the powerful effect that your food has on your mood? Food like Soul Food, that you think of as comfort food actually does little to comfort. While they may bring delight to your palate for a moment, they leave you feeling cramped, bloated, sluggish and these foods lead to inflammation in the joints which further leaves you feeling poorly. A diet rich in fruits and vegetables will leave you feeling light, energized and empowered knowing you are doing the right thing for your body. If you need help in knowing what to eat to energize you, improve your mood and reduce stress, get your hands on my book, 30 Days 30 Ways to Salad Heaven.

 

Gratitude

Listen, even in the hardest of times, God has been mmm mmm good to you. Think about how He’s provided for you. Thing about how He’s kept you. Think about how He’s empowered you to forgive those who have wronged you. Think about the beautiful friends and family He’s given you. Think about the talent He’s placed in you. There are so so many reasons to give thanks. So pause and reflect on His praiseworthy deeds and the mighty works of His hands and offer up a Thank You Lord! It will surely shift your focus off of your current stress and unto His goodness.

 

And I have so many others, I may have to do a Part 2. If you’d like to see a part two of this series leave me a comment. And also let me know how any of the above strategies have helped you manage stress.

 

While each of these suggestions may seem a small thing, when coupled together as part of your overall wellness protocol, they will yield a GREAT return. I pray your month is filled with God’s joy and His peace which surpasses all understanding.

 

As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!

 

 

22Nov
Tyra Lane-KingslandSpiritual Life

She’s Making Moves

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Sister Friend

I SEE YOU!

You’re making moves. On your job, in your home, and in your community.

Mom

Wife

Therapist

Group Leader

PTA President

Entrepreneur

And the greatest move of all, is what you are doing for the Kingdom. You are walking with God. You are standing on His word. Your allowing His word to be a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path. You are walking in paths of righteousness for His namesake. You are being led by the spirit.

Indeed you are making moves Sis! I am so honored that day by day God makes His grace ABOUND toward me so that I am duly equipped (2 Corinthians 9:8) to make moves in my many spheres of influence.

But for those who know God has called you to make a move, yet you’ve stalled for whatever reason, let this serve as your catalyst. GET MOVING! And how can you get started?

  1. GET CLEAR – Carve out some time to clarify your mission and vision. Think through who you will serve and how you will serve them. Then narrow the scope. You may be gifted in many areas but what is the thing you are CALLED to do.
  2. WRITE IT OUT – Once you have a clear vision you must write it out. This helps to solidify the intent. As you’re writing things out, there will be action items and you’re more likely to carry them out if they’re written down.

For the rest of the steps, Join me over on SHE’S MAKING MOVES
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07Nov
Tyra Lane-KingslandSpiritual Life

3 Step Easy Elderberry Syrup

Well, with five school aged children and a toddler who’s a thumb sucker, my crew has the potential to come into contact with lots of germies. So how do we keep our immune systems healthy and strong? We do that by eating lots of fruits and veggies, hand washing, exericse and getting adequate rest.

But to bolster our ability to fight off illness, we have another weapon in our arsenal.

Elderberry Syrup

As far back as Ancient Egypt, people have been using Elderberries as part of their wellness plan. Elderberries, also known as Sambucus, are used to treat a variety of ailments such as cold, fevers and nasal congestion.

Over the last few years I’ve been asked on many occasions my recipe for elderberry syrup so I’m finally taking an opportunity to write it down here for all my buddies who are looking for a recipe. Elderberry syrup can be purchased in your local natural food store but it’s just as easy to make and more cost effective to just whip up at batch since you may already have a few of the ingredients right at home.

Elderberry Syrup

1/2 cup dried elderberries

1 cinnamon stick

4 cloves

2 inch piece fresh ginger (peeled & sliced)

4 cups water

1/2 cup honey

Step 1

In a pot bring 4 cups water to boil. Add all ingredients except honey. Simmer on medium low for about 20 minutes or until liquid reduces by half.

Step 2

Remove from heat and strain.

Step 3

Add honey and stir well. Store in a mason jar in the fridge.

Here’s to keeping your family healthy and whole during cold and flu season.

As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!

21Oct
Tyra Lane-KingslandSpiritual Life

5 Steps For Reclaiming Your Health When You’ve Fallen Off The Wagon

All it takes is ONE thing. 

Any.one.thing.

Working late one evening.

Extreme fatigue one day.

A phone call delivering bad news.


Then, you look up one day and realize you’ve fallen off the wagon.

But such is life right? Stops and starts and stops and starts again. Life can be cyclical like that at times. But just because you binged on those cookies doesn’t mean you cannot recover well. It does no good to swim in a sea of self-condemnation because all that will do is drive you into the arms of the next cookie; nor does it erase all the positive steps you made in seeking to honor your temple. 

God saw you the day you kept walking past the office kitchen loaded with donuts. God saw you the day you chose the apple out of your purse instead of the candy from the vending machine. God saw you when you made it to your 6am bootcamp class when you wanted nothing more than to sleep late on that rainy morning. 

And because God sees you and loves you, He’s willing to help you get back on track. All is not lost. Here’s the good news. Falling off isn’t fatal, it’s staying there that will cause you trouble. Now get up, dust yourself off and get back on it! When we fall, God is faithful to pick us up and set our feet on solid ground (Psalm 40:2).

Here are your 5 Steps For Reclaiming Your Health When You’ve Fallen Off The Wagon


Destroy The Idols & Repent

Anytime we allow anything to consume us, to become an elevated object of our affection or to replace the space devoted to God, we allow that thing to become an idol. And food surely has a way of becoming an idol. Slothfulness has a way of becoming an idol. Right now in Jesus’ name we bring destruction to anything we’ve allowed to become an idol. Repentance is our inward response to knowing we’ve done something offensive to God. It is when we own up to our wrongdoing and decide that we will turn away from it. So today we stand and declare that idols are eradicated and we repent for dishonoring our temples.


Forgive Yourself

The enemy of our souls seeks to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) and as such seeks to rip you to shreds. He will play the highlight reel of every stumble you’ve ever had. He will keep reminding you, “Guilty, guilty, guilty!”

BUT GOD! 

“So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed  you from the power of sin that leads to death.” Romans 8:1-2

So forgive yourself and silence the enemy. Jesus’ death presents you holy, without blemish and free from accusation (Colossians 1:22). There is freedom in forgiveness so forgive yourself as God forgives you.


Self Assess

So how did you fall off the wagon? Were you overworked and overwhelmed? Were your hormones out of whack? Assess how you got here. Are there any particular triggers, patterns or even times of year that contribute to you neglecting your health? I had some triggers this summer. You can read more of that HERE. Knowing how you got here can help you cut it off at the pass should you start leaning off the wagon.


Enlist Support

We are not made to traverse the rigors of life alone. Thus, it is crucial that we are in a supportive community that encourages us, teaches us AND holds us accountable. Where is that community for you? Well, you’ve got one RIGHT HERE. It is not easy when you go to work and there is sugar on your co-worker’s desk. It is not easy when the grocery store is mainly stocked with junk masquerading as food. It is not easy when you truly don’t have the energy and motivation to workout. It is not easy when you want to read a novel more than you want to read your bible. Argh! But that is exactly when community support kicks in, giving us the prod we need to stay on the right track. In community we sharpen one another (Proverbs 27:17), restore one another and bear each other’s burdens (Galatians 6:1-2).


Holistic Approach

Remember you are a triune being. You are a spirit, housed within a body, with a soul that allows you to engage with God’s creation. Thus any plan for honoring your health has to be a holistic one. You must nurture your spirit, nourish your body and regulate your soul. To neglect any one of these areas is to neglect them all. 

By employing the above steps, I’m certain you’ll be riding high on the wellness wagon. Let me know in the comments which step you might find challenging so that I can pray with you.

“Don’t you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought at a price. Therefore glorify God in your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20


For DAILY inspiration be sure you’re following me on FB & on IG


As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!

09Aug
Tyra Lane-KingslandReal Life 2

How Toni’s Morrison’s Words Influence My Parenting


“It’s interesting to see when a kid walks into the room… does your face light up? That’s what they’re looking for…when my children used to walk in the room when they were little, I looked at them to see if they had buckled their trousers or if their hair was combed or their socks were up…so you think your affection and your deep love is on display cause you’re caring for them, it’s not. When they see you they see the critical face…what’s wrong now? …But then if you let your face speak what’s in your heart. Because when they walked in the room I was glad to see them. It’s just as small as that, you see.”

Toni Morrison

Nobel laureate and novelist, Toni Morrison shared these deep yet simply stated musings on an episode of Oprah’s Lifeclass. So eloquently she illustrated the difference between meeting temporal needs and maximizing on the opportunity to connect with the heart. Oprah went on to say that one of her own biggest learning lessons of the early 90’s was that the common denominator in the human experience is that everyone wants to be appreciated or validated. 

And don’t we see that in our world today? The rash brazenness of broken people intent on hurting themselves and others because they long to be seen, to be known, to be validated, and to be loved.

And oh how many times I’ve missed the mark on this. But watching this segment left an indelible mark on me, raising my awareness of SEEING my children.  Morrison captures the essence of it because truly much of parental life is consumed with meeting temporal needs which can suffocate connection. Endless piles of laundry, shuttling children to and from activities, cooking meals, you know the drill. 

The job of parenting finds us doing seemingly important things for our children but we don’t want to miss out on the needed thing.  Just as Jesus affirmed that Mary had chosen the better part, let us choose the better part and that is connecting with the hearts of our children. Doing so demands that we slow down.

The human heart craves connection and we must make ourselves available for our children.

How available are you if your face is planted in an electronic device when your child is trying to talk to you? How available are you when you an inundated with 2 million worries because that stack of medical bills keeps getting higher and higher? 

This is when you have to cast all your cares on God and eliminate distractions so that you make yourself available for connection. Connection is carried out through communication. It is imperative that you communicate in ways that your child can perceive and receive. Be sure to check out 5 Ways To Communicate With Your Child Better.

Love sees and love notices and love cares. When a pregnant Hagar attempted to flee because of Sarai’s cruelty, she had an encounter with el-Roi, The God Who Sees. Not only did the angel of the Lord see her there, he blessed her. Just as God saw Hagar sitting there, He sees you and He sees your children. Yup, that’s what love does; love sees. Our children, in their own unique way are crying out, “Do you see me?” And in return, it is not the critical face, the glare or the correction of external trappings that I want to offer. I want them to see my face light up. 

“It’s just as small as that you see.”


Some of the thoughts shared in this post are adapted from my book, Purposeful Parenting. Be sure to pick up a copy for yourself or one for a friend.


As always it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!

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